Robin Reflection

This morning during meditation i heard a robin repeatedly throwing himself at the kitchen window. This happens every spring during mating season as the robin sees his reflection in the glass and tries to scare off the "other" bird.

People do this all the time, every day, but it's hidden under the psychological defense called "projection." We "see" ourselves--our actions, our behavior, our mental thoughts--in the outside world, and if we have not been acting wholesomely, we pin our own unease on the other person.

For instance, if i can't find the keys to my car, i often think Bill! and blame him for my missing keys. They are lost, and i'm sure I didn't lose them. Then i find them in my coat pocket.

One of my recent discoveries was a judgment i was laying at the feet of a couple who were pillars of the church i used to attend. What hypocrites! i used to think. I believed this thought for decades. Last week, i reexamined this thought and the situation that gave rise to it. In my mind's eye, i saw myself acting hypocritically--shaking their hands, passing the peace to them, and smiling while thinking They are such hypocrits. I was the one who was a hypocrit in that situation: I didn't want to shake their hands; I did not want to pass the peace to them; and my smile was forced. They were simply a mirror for my own internal thoughts and emotions.

Oh, it is way past time to let that old, old grudge sink into the love and peace that they were sending my way. It's time to send them some love and peace, even though they are both deceased. It's time to send that girl Cheryl some love for her innocence and her misguided projections. It's time to make amends to her.

CHRISTMAS TREE REDUX

We took down the Christmas tree and carried it outdoors. And there we set it up again in a snowbank, known in other seasons as my white garden. Now that garden is well and truly white--with snow. For the next ten weeks, we have a tree standing near the front door, sort of defining the white garden with a bit of vertical greenery. Instant landscaping!

We did this while the temperature was still above freezing and the wet snow could be shoveled and

then banked around the base of the tree. Two hours later, the temperature dropped below freezing and

now the tree  and its stand are frozen solidly into the icy snow for the next three days as

temperatures drop back into the single numbers.

We think of our words and actions as changeable, pliable, melting away on the next breath.

Yet, if we repeat the same thought or the same action over and over, the neural pathway forms a rut,

and a habit becomes frozen in place. A habit becomes part of our inner landscape, and we start to

believe that's who we really are.

Let's watch our thoughts and actions carefully and make sure that they are in accord with our highest

intentions. Let's plant mindfulness right at the front door of our mouth.

 

The Roots of Forcing Hyacinths

It's time to bring hyacinth bulbs up from the basement. By this time, they have a vase full of swirling white roots and an inch or two of green leaves sprouting. On a few, i can even see the buds of the hyacinth itself.

Although i collect forcing vases from thrift store, i really like carafes. They are large enough to show off the roots, which are fascinating all by themselves.

If we could see the roots of our actions, we might think twice before we speak or act. Knowing that we ourselves carry the historical trauma of our ancestors, how can we bear to send any of it downstream to the generations that succeed us?

I say "trauma" with a small "t," though many people have deep Trauma (with a capital T) from this very lifetime. I am talking about the ordinary trauma of daily lives. My mother was a child of the Great Depression and collected stuff in case the Depression returned tomorrow. By osmosis, i have "inherited" her pack rat tendencies.

The best way to clean up our act today is to commit to the 5 Precepts, which guide us to a life of integrity.

Today, i intend to

1. do no harm to anyone,
2. take nothing that is not freely offered,
3. use my sexual/sensual energy wisely,
4. speak truthfully & helpfully, and
5. keep my mind clear.

The hyacinth roots look so white, and clean and pure.

Bear in the Compost Pile

The last time i looked, it was full to the brim. Hmmmm.

I'm pretty sure the bear finally got into my compost pile. My square 4-pallet bin was filled to the top with garden debris--dead leaves and last year's stems--plus a few kitchen scraps--onion skins, banana peels, grapefruit rinds, and coffee filters.

Earlier this week, i really looked at my compost pile, and it was a foot below the top. Someone had smashed it down. Not me. And, at first glance, i couldn't see any kitchen scraps at all, not even a teabag.

Somebody's been in my compost bin.

So, now i'm dividing our kitchen scraps into 2 buckets: one marked "for the bear" and one marked "for the chickens." The bear gets the onion skins, coffee grounds, and teabags. My neighbor's chickens get the vegetable matter.

The Buddha recommends dividing your thoughts and actions into 2 piles: wholesome and unwholesome.
Try it. For a few minutes or a few hours.

This exercise is a great way to become aware of those bugbear thoughts, the thoughtless zingers that trip off our tongue, and our kind and unkind actions.

It's time to stop feeding the bear!

Lasagna Gardens

Let Lasagna Gardening begin!

8 yards of bark mulch, delivered last week, have been spread on the flower beds. Right over the top of last year's dead leaves. Maybe i should call this the No-Rake method.

If you're starting a garden from scratch, building the lasagna (cardboard, mulch hay, peat moss, compost, etc.) is a lot of fun. But what about your already established gardens?

For the vegetable garden, i pile on the mulch hay in the fall, along with some wood ashes. If i'm really ambitious, i add a truckload of manure. In the spring, i pile on the compost.

For the flowerbeds, the lasagna started last fall with the cutting down of the brown stems and leaves.

If it's brown,

cut it down.

If it's green,

it's clean.    

So i started my "spring clean-up" last fall.

In the spring, the beds are littered with leaves. Leave them in place. They are the first lasagna layer. I used to add a layer of bunny manure, and then a layer of bark mulch. You could add a layer of compost, and then bark mulch. Now i add a special mix of bark mulch that has well-composted manure added to it. Voila! The gardens look great.

Our actions--thoughts, words, and deeds--are constantly being "composted," laying the foundations for our habits (good habits or bad habits). Our habits then harden into character or disposition.

This present moment is a "lasagna garden" of every action we have taken up till now.

Since we don't want weeds--in our garden or our mind--we start by cleaning up our act, cleaning up our actions. Begin with gratitude. Practice kindness--not only random acts of kindness, but a constant stream of kindness. Feel compassion for yourself, first of all. Find forgiveness.

Lay down  the old grudges and resentments, and let them compost into the soil that grows a full and open heart.

Christmas Tree Redux

We took down the Christmas tree and carried it outdoors. And there we set it up again in a snowbank, known in other seasons as my white garden. Now that garden is well and truly white--with snow. For the next ten weeks, we have a tree standing near the front door, sort of defining the white garden with a bit of vertical greenery. Instant landscaping!

We did this while the temperature was still above freezing and the wet snow could be shoveled and then banked around the base of the tree. Two hours later, the temperature dropped below freezing and now the tree  and its stand are frozen solidly into the icy snow for the next three days as temperatures drop back into the single numbers.

We think of our words and actions as changeable, pliable, melting away on the next breath.

Yet, if we repeat the same thought or the same action over and over, the neural pathway forms a rut, and a habit becomes frozen in place. A habit becomes part of our inner landscape, and we start to believe that's who we really are.

Let's watch our thoughts and actions carefully and make sure that they are in accord with our highest intentions. Let's plant mindfulness right at the front door of our mouth.

Flat Plastic Vase

For the New Year's Eve sit at Vermont Insight Meditation Center last night, Drew brought a bouquet of alstromeria and a flat plastic vase. How handy! And easy to carry on an icy night. Just puff out the plastic, fill it with water, and the plastic holds its vase shape.

We ourselves hold the shape of our past actions. By this time in life, we've acquired lots of habits--gestures, ways of thinking, manners of speech, and a raft of opinions and judgments. We call this collection of habits "I."

Really, our physical container is puffed up with 60% water. Our container may be naturally good looking, or maybe not so much. But really it is just a container that will one day be flattened by death.

Our habits, our actions are the only thing we own. In this new year of 2014, let's focus on skillful and wholesome and beautiful actions.

I'm beginning by being grateful to Drew for the beautiful bouquet.