Hyacinths Sprouting

The hyacinth bulbs i began forcing in December are sprouting green now down in my basement. I'm bringing them up to warmth and sun in the kitchen, one by one.

What's hibernating in the basement of your heart? Some delayed dream? A spiritual path that heads off in a direction you can't quite see? A desire for peace? A yearning to rest from restlessness? A hunger for happiness?

Sit. Only sit and wait.  Don't distract yourself with busy-ness. Your authentic self will bloom when it's ready.

photo by Nancy Riege

Vaccine Cold

It’s vaccine cold outdoors. Single digits. 

A local hospital's refrigerator was 9 degrees instead of the recommended 2-8*. Would they have to throw the 860 doses of vaccine away? 

Feel your heart cringe as you read that sentence. Oh no! They have to throw it away? That’s 860 people.

Feel your resistance to what is. Notice that suffering or discontent co-arises with resistance. Acceptance = Peace.

Feel the resistance to the intense cold outdoors.

Rest.

Moderna said the hospital could use the 860 doses after all.

* This turns out to be Celsius, not Fahrenheit as i originally thought.

Christmas Tree Reborn

 

Our Christmas tree left us yesterday. Rest in Peace dear friend. December 6-January 25.

Behold! Our Christmas tree is reborn outside, near the front door. A green tree sprouted in a snow bank. I call it instant landscaping.

Birth. Death. Birth. Death. Birth is happening every moment. Death is happening every moment.

Have you noticed?

Winter Wonderland

It's a winter wonderland here today. Big fat snowflakes falling. Pine trees bowing under the weight of the snow. All is still.

"Hear rest" is one of my favorite meditations. It's like listening to the sound of silence.

Pay attention to your throat. Relax your throat and keep it relaxed. Notice that every time a thought crosses your mind, you experience a sub-vocalization and your throat tenses up a little bit.

Relax your throat. Relax into stillness.

Floating Hope

This morning, i looked out the kitchen window and saw the word HOPE floating in the trees on the other side of the lawn.

Usually, hope is a desire for something different--wanting this moment to be different or wanting an outcome to be different. The Buddhist path cultivates the equanimity of accepting this moment just as it is. We may not like it. We may not like the news, for instance, but accepting what is, as it is, is clear-eyed seeing.

The Buddha teaches us about the path. Desire, wanting, craving are the sources of the problem. When we stop wanting, when we stop resisting this moment, as unpleasant as it may be, our minds and hearts come to rest.

Then we proceed with our heart leading the way.

The Tracks of Mother Nature

The melting snow shows the footsteps of Mother Nature. The bounding tracks of squirrels melted first, looking like giant footprints through the snow.

Animals are looking for food, water, and shelter, so their tracks usually tell one of those stories. These melted squirrel tracks come from the apple tree in our yard straight to our deck, where the bird feeder is.

If we could see our own invisible tracks, they would show us going from one craving, one desire to another. Refrigerator. Music. Computer. Where did i put my phone? TV. Toilet. Bed. Refrigerator.

If we could see the tracks of our minds, oh, what a merry chase they would lead us! Hopping from one mental desire to another. It can be very instructive to simply write down our stream of consciousness for a few minutes.

Rest your body. Rest your mind. Come home to the here and now.

Dragonflies in the Skies

Dragonflies are flying around over my four-foot wide fishpond and my lawn in the forest. I'm surprised that my "puddle" in the woods attracts them.

The dragonflies fly at an altitude of about 30 feet, so i don't notice them unless i look up. Now i realize one more reason why we don't have mosquitoes in our yard. The dragonflies are patrolling the skies.

If we can open our minds to peripheral awareness--awareness of all the sights, sounds, senses that are happening every moment--we can patrol the sky of awareness even while watching the meditation object of a dragonfly or the breath, for instance.

If we rest in awareness, then we can catch those pesky mosquito thoughts before they cling to us and bite.

Rest in awareness like a dragonfly.

Half-Price Tulips

I succumbed. I bought 2 packages of tulip bulbs at the hardware store. Usually, i don't buy bulbs until they go on sale for half price after Thanksgiving. After all, the chipmunks are going to eat the bulbs, so how much do i want to pay for chipmunk food?

But the bags of bulbs at the hardware store were already half the usual price i pay for bulbs. Yes, i know. Bulbs at the hardware store are likely to be second-class, second-rate bulbs. Small bulbs, not full-size. Well, the chipmunks won't care. And i do like the colors--a blend of pink-and-white bulbs.

So i feel good; i feel happy about buying the bulbs. And i feel unhappy as i tell myself i "shouldn't" have done that. At least, not yet.

This is one daily example of the civil war of the mind. Yes-No. Good-Bad. Should-Shouldn't. Now-Later.

Then there's the second-guessing. Let it go, Cheryl. The bulbs have been paid for. You are happy about that. You are just unhappy with your mind. Going back and forth between should and shouldn't is useless. Really useless.

Plant the blooming bulbs and be done with it. Let the bulbs and yourself rest.

Change

Two days ago, i was feeding carrot sticks to ostriches and camels at Philip's Animal Garden in Aruba. Today, a friend sends me a photo of a fox walking across her snowy backyard.

Change. A big change. From 80 degrees every day in Aruba to 20 degrees her at home in the North Country. It's all in constant flux.

Sometimes, i play a mental game with myself. Could i commit Aruba to memory? But which moment is Aruba? It's impossible to disentangle any one moment from the whole experience of Aruba.

My tropical vacation is gone. Gone. Memories linger, of course. My skin is tanned. Another friend tells me i look deeply rested.

Delicious change.

Big Fish in a Small Pond

Last November, my little fishpond had 19 goldfish who were all 6 years old and about 4 inches long. This spring, one remained. I found no dead bodies, which leads me to suspect the great blue heron fished them out last fall when i wasn't looking.

Two weeks ago, i bought a dozen 19-cent goldfish, one inch long, at the pet store. The frogs ate them for dinner. Last week, i went to a bigger pet store, which had 35-cent goldfish, almost 2 inches long. I bought 2 dozen.

The remaining large goldfish hides under a rock. I suspect she is depressed, having spent 6 months in solitude. But now, a week after the teenage goldfish arrived, she is swimming about, leading the school of smaller fish. I suspect the big fish in my small pond is blind because she can smell the fish food, but she can't see it.

We too are blind to the "waters" we swim in. Cosmic consciousness is all around us and through us, but we can't see it or feel it because we're so caught up in the details of life.

Relax. And stay alert. Rest in life.

Rest the Body

Nonnie, Christmas, 1985

My gardening grandmother, who was crippled by arthritis for the last 30 years of her life, often chuckled that she had a hitch in her git-along. Now i have a hitch in my git-along too. I can't even bend over. Oh! It is so hard to look at the garden and not be able to do anything. I can't pull a weed or transplant tomatoes or.... anything.

The Buddha recommends the Five Daily Reflections to us:

1. I am of the nature to become old. Aging is inevitable.
2. I am of the nature to become ill (and have a hitch in my git-along).
3. I am of the nature to die. Death is unavoidable.
4. Everything i cherish (like the garden) will change and vanish.
5. My actions are the only thing i own.

I'm focused on the body this week--aging and not doing what the mind wants it to do. The relationship between body and mind becomes clear: the mind orders the body around and the body thoughtlessly obeys, until it just can't do it. The body sends pain signals, which the mind responds to with impatience. The mind throws a tantrum. But this is so inconvenient! I want my functioning body back!

The body has been the slave of the mind for all these years. The body is aging. The body has been stressed and strained. The body wants to rest.

Rest in the garden. Rest in peace.

Fertilizing Houseplants

I'm just now feeding my houseplants for the first time since November. During the days of little light, i allow them to rest for a couple of months. But now that light is increasing both in the morning and in the evening, i add some fertilizer to the watering can.

We too need a rest period, a retreat from the go-go-go of growing our lives, our jobs, and our responsibilities.

I have a couple of retreats planned for March, before gardening season begins in earnest.

And you? How and where do you take your solitude? When do you rest your mind? When do you soak the filters so that you can see in full technicolor and hear in full surround sound again?

Photo from home.howstuffworks.com